Silence scars me, no sight other than walls makes me feel like a prisoner, I can fight an enemy but I can not fight the air I breathe and thoughts when hit the boundaries of vision they go hard on heart and mind. These are not just words but the feelings of millions captured in sentences. Feelings that spoke louder than voice yet heard by none. No sight of blood, no wound yet a soul lost every minute. I name this pandemic "an invisible slayer". When you see that death is waiting with its mouth open you may be safe yet the sight and sound of it shakes your bones. COVID-19 hit the world at the same but residents of this world acted differently. I have my experience wrapped in traumatized thoughts.
It was 11-March-2021. I was at my college trying to study for my intermediate board exams and day was very normal until night came with two dark skies, one sky was above our heads and other was going to hit the head. There was an order for emergency evacuation of hostel and I was one of the four prefects of the hostel who was informed of the news before anyone else and I was assigned to tell two hundred students that the virus has entered your country and now its time to keep yourself safe from it as there was no other option at that time. I did not break the news until everyone was in their rooms and then I went in every room of the hostel and informed everyone individually. I had to convince students from Balochistan and Sindh that they must leave the hostel immediately. Chaos was on its way and I do not know why but I was feeling that there are some faces that I would not been seeing again. Hostel was supposed to be vacant the next morning and till afternoon about 90% students had left. I stayed one more night and confirmed that everyone leaves before I do. I left the hostel on 13-March-2021. Who knew that I was not only leaving hostel but the college with it never to be seen again as a student.
By now I have reached my home but the story still was not turning any good because I had four doctors in my house who were constantly doing their emergency calls because the patient count just sky rocketed as expected. Every day started with a prayer that I could meet my siblings yet it was after four days since I was home and then my brother came home . That day I came to know that having sight of someone can be a type of greeting. This invisible slayer just toppled over the normal and changed what we can say a normal event. This pandemic was hitting hard on my thoughts and I think I had more damage to my personality than I could have ever thought in this span of time. pandemic has not left us yet and people are still dying, they are still suffering and yet some policy makers think that a young mind can just ignore the news of thousands of people dying and can still appear in exams with a light mind. I feel very sad to be governed by those who are not even able to truly comprehend the state of a single mind.
I stated only what I felt and still feeling. This dark sky, invisible slayer or simply put as pandemic have damaged the structure of thoughts yet I force my optimistic side to think and expect that one day I will wake up to the news that COVID-19 that caused death of millions is dead now. Sun may rise again with our hopes and Moon may look as beautiful as it was before someone dear died and became a star.
Ahmad Raza
200101121
Aero-19A